The following item was sold to me in a flower shop.
It was wrapped up in paper as a bouquet would be.
It has a large stalk, and an ornamental part at the top.
I keep it in a vase.
(Ok, technically in a glass. But only because Andy won’t let me buy useless things like vases, plants and large ornamental pieces of wood until be move into a real apartment… he’s such a meany).
However, the non-German among you will notice, possibly even immediately, that it is not a real flower:
It is a cabbage.
I am quite convinced that no culture so reveres the cabbage as much as the German (although I’m sure there will be a heavy rebuttal from the Polish community on this point)
Possibly even harder than learning the German language, for the humble auslander who comes from a land where cabbage refers to a single type of pale green vegetable, is learning the 37,000 different types of cabbage, and 37,000 factorial usages for said cabbage.
I mean seriously. What the CRAP is this?:
I’m trying to tell myself they use this for compost, witchcraft, removal of white-ants or warding off of Auslanders… but the positioning in the supermarket right next to the innocent Orange Juice would suggest not.
In case you’re wondering, it tastes EXACTLY like sauerkraut juice should taste.
I guess next time I finish off a jar of pickled gherkins I can just save the brine for the next time I have guests.